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Entries in Fight Club (1)

Monday
Mar152010

Empire Magazine is Just a Bunch of Monkeys with Typewriters

So it looks like Briton based film mag Empire is making a run at dethroning ESPN for the title of Most Retarded List of Excellence Ever Accumulated.

We're Retarded

A year and 1/2 ago Empire came out with a list of the Greatest Movie Characters of ALL TIME.  And wow, to put it like our friends across the pond might, it was one piece of rubbish alright.

Sure it was almost two years ago now but I just saw it yesterday so it is new to me.

Now, the whole list was an atrocity but lets take a look at some of the highlights.

#1 Tyler Durden.

The guy from Fight Club.  Seriously?  Wow.  I mean it was a cool movie and all but... wow. Just... This must have been a readers poll, right?  Please tell me it was a readers poll.

Hi, I'm the greatest, most interesting, complex, and charismatic character ever created in film. I'm also Brad Pitt, wanna see my abs?

#3 The Joker (Dark Knight).

Classic case of people having the memory of a goldfish.  If this had come out a year earlier this would have been Anton Chigurh from No Country for Old Men.

#8 Captain Jack Sparrow.

Oh, but this makes sense. Yeah, twenty years from now everyone will talk about the Pirates of the Caribbean series and compare it to Star Wars and Indiana Jones, Die Hard.  Yeah, its just as good as those movies...

#16 Neo.

Yeah, cause Keanu Reeves is what everyone loved about the original Matrix movie.

#22 Ellis "Red" Redding (Shawshank Redemption)

Really?  I'm more surprised that anyone knew this character's full name than anything else.